Archive for February, 2006

Urgent Care is a Bad Thing

Don’t and I repeat DON’T go to the Walk In Clinic that’s near Rivergate by Home Depot…Tennessee Urgent Care, I believe it’s called.

I take the Princess there yesterday evening because she’s been coughing and hacking and just plain not feeling good for a few days. I did not want to, but since our longtime family doctor up and retired on us we had no choice. (It would’ve taken 3 or 4 days just to get a call back from the new one).

We arrive at 5:10. There’s a pretty good roomfull of folks (actually, everybody and their redneck cousin was there). We fill out the paperwork, pay the $50 copay (say WHAT?) and wait.

They have a sign on the wall that says something about “Don’t be alarmed if somebody hasn’t been here as long as you have is called before you.” They called a few people before us and because I’m a good girl and follow directions, I was not alarmed.

They kept calling all these other people back and there we sat. Finally, after an hour and a half, I ask the girl (who we had been sitting right in front of after all this time) how much longer and she says “What’s the name?” I tell her and the nurse says “There’s no chart here.” I was determined not to pitch a fit and make a scene. The thing that got me was the lack of apology I got. It didn’t matter I had sat there that long and the receptionist had messed up and put our chart in the wrong place. I collected my $50 and we left.

I learned a couple things in the process…one, I need to grow a set of testicles and two, Tennessee Urgent Care….don’t go there unless you’re behind on your people watching.

Is There Such A Thing As Too Good?

When I heard Martina McBride was releasing a cd of classic country songs, nobody was happier than I. Martina is an incredible vocalist and I think has wasted her time doing those crappy, sappy, pop-schlop numbers she’s been so fond of in recent years. (If I hear one more song about a daughter, I will shoot myself)

I’m all about old country music. The crap that comes out of Music Row today is so lame. (ex. Badonkadonk and Ms. SugarPits Girl) Stand any of the garbage Music Row produces today up against a Hank, Sr. song, or Hank Snow or Buck Owens, etc. they would kick their ass.

So I get this cd and look at the titles, which happen to be some of my absolute most favorite songs ever written: “Today I Started Loving You Again,” “Help Me Make It Through The Night,” “Once A Day,” “You Aint Woman Enough,” and a bunch of others. I am pumped. She even had Marty aka “Dandalion” Stuart write the liner notes….Dolly and Dwight both throw a little harmony in there. The stage is set for brilliance. So why am I left thinking “Ok, it’s going to get really good in a minute?”

The tracks are great, her voice is great…but she sings so perfectly that it’s like she went off and left her soul home that day. Her version of “You Aint Woman Enough” sounds exactly like what it is: a white, middle class girl from the Midwest, singing a Loretta Lynn song. Hear me, I’m not trying to compare Martina’s recordings to the originals……no way. I’m all for different interpretations of art and love to hear different takes on stuff. (Unlike moldy, old figs who are anti anything done in the last 40 years).

It’s so stinkin’ flawless and perfect. Maybe I have an inner, subconscious thing against Martina because everything about her is so seemingly perfect?? Yeah, that’s it. She’s got the husband (ok I have one of those too) the three little cherub kids (I got them too) this amazing voice and pencil thin figure (I have a “decent” voice at best and the only thing pencily about me is, well, nothing.)

Maybe that’s why my favorite singer types are the ones that aren’t so perfect….like Skeeter Davis, for example. How she made a long, succesful career as a solo artist is a miracle but she was one of the best. She made ground-breaking records that crossed over the oceans and the charts. She didn’t make the best choices in men (She married Ralph Emery, for the love) she got kicked off the Opry once for badmouthing the Nashville Police Dept. for arresting Jesus Freaks. She was this hip, unique, Buddy the Elf type of person who I miss.

Like Larry the Cable Guy said, “Martina McBride can sing but she aint no Skeeter Davis.”

Go Kinky

I wish I lived in Texas so I could vote for the Kinkster.

Anybody who could write a song like “They Ain’t Making Jews Like Jesus Anymore” or “Get Your Bisquits in the Oven and Your Buns In the Bed” and who is for gay marriage because they “deserve to be miserable like the rest of us”, deserves to be the head honcho of the Lonestar State.

If you want to see something funny, watch the reality series they’re doing on CMT on Kinky’s campaign. The guy is so funny but he’s also very smart and practical. I hope he wins.

February 19, 1992

Lots of stuff has happened since February 19, 1992. It’s odd to think it’s been 14 years since I saw my dad. At the same time, I see him everyday, especially in my two boys. One looks exactly like him and the other acts exactly like him. Sometimes, I see him when I look in the mirror.

At church today, they sang an old hymn, “Send The Light” and on the part where the bass part echoes, I heard my dad. One of my favorite things is when we sing one of those old hymns and I can swear I hear his baritone/bass (whatever he was in the mood for).

I inherited lots of things from, namely his fair skin, his twisted, sometimes off the wall sense of humor, his Attention Deficit, his eyes, the tendency to analyze everybody and everything and other things. I think the thing I’m most grateful I inherited, or learned from him, is the importance of placing my faith in God and the importance of committing each and every day to Him.

He was a dandy.

No Bidness Like Show Bidness

The Grascals are trying to get to Boston for a rather large festival today. They rode back from a show in Asheville last night, straight to the airport and their adventure for this trip is beginning to sound a little like “Planes, Trains and Automobiles.”

At BNA, the plane had to be stopped and started a few times to reboot the computers (that’s comforting) and for de-icing. They missed their connection in DC. Had to go through security twice and now will have to go through New York then to Providence then to rent cars.

Stories like this remind me why I never pursued music as a career. It’s so glamorous.

The Ghost of Ted Baxter Spotted In Nashville

Ted Baxter is alive and well and living in Nashville. I know cause I saw him at the hair salong this evening. “Ted” is a tall, somewhat handsome feller and he still really, really likes himself. He was well dressed, perfectly coiffed and on the prowl.

Ted was waiting his turn and was sitting next to an attractive young woman, who was decked in foils. He struck up a conversation with her and was working the old Baxter charm. I heard enough of the conversation to hear him ask about her line of work. The exchange went something like this:

God’s Gift To Humanity: “What DOES an accountant do?”

Attractive Young Lady: “There are different types of accountants.”

Ted Baxter/Ron Burgundy: ” So, you keep track of people’s money?”

At that moment, Ted/Ron was called back for his appointment, I’m sure, much to the relief of the attractive, intelligent young lady.

Further humoring me, Anchorman was on his way back from the shampoo sink when he stopped in my mirror to take a quick peek. Thought for a minute he was going to give himself the ol’ Pistol Shoot at himself.

Reckon he plays Jazz Flute?

Carlene Carter

I haven’t seen this in the news anywhere, but happened upon it on another website. Carlene Carter has gotten married again.

Her amazing country music pedigree aside (mom June Carter Cash and dad is the still hot and charming Carl Smith) Carlene Carter is one of my favorite singer/songwriter types. Highly underrated as a songwriter, she has written some brilliant songs through the years. “Easy From Now On” (a #1 hit for Emmylou back in the 70’s) has one of the best and most poetic lines I’ve ever heard in a song….”I’ll be flying high in a fandangled sky”…

Carlene’s had her fair share of ups and downs in recent years. She has buried her mother, stepfather, sister, longtime boyfriend and step mother, all in the span of less than two years. She’s fought the law and the law won, but, she’s clean and sober and I saw her brilliantly portray her mother this past summer in the play “Wildwood Flowers.” Good for her.