Archive for January 16th, 2007

American Idol Thawts

It’s something of a family tradition for the Smiffs to gather round the hearth and watch the American Idol auditions.  I have mixed feelings watching. I love the crazies.  I feel bad for the ones who really think they can sing and can’t though.  That poor girl that loved Jewel and had a meltdown when they said no made me sad.

I also think Simon got him some new teeth over the summer.  He’s showing them off and smiling a lot more than he usually does.  He reminds me of Kermit the Frog when he got teeth. 

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Yee Haw

Imgp0236 The fine cuisine in which I have the priviledge to partake in for the next little bit.  Jealous ain’t ya?

Imgp0240 As you can see, I am allowed some chocolate. I’ve told my family I better not catch them in my food.  I know it’ll be tempting, especially for 6’4, 160 lb Mr. Smiff.

Imgp0239 Nothing says "Good morning" like instant scrambled eggs, does it?  I’m most looking forward to rising to that delicacy. 

I’m beginning to think Sister Gastrica might’ve had the right idear with having her a new stomach made.  Y’all pray for me now.  I’ll blog the progress, but, I am NOT telling y’all how much I weigh. 

Take that, Wintermute!

Opening Up A Can of Whiff Ass

#2 has not-so-great social skills due to his symptoms of Asperger’s Syndrome. (No official diagnosis yet, which we’re working on, but, according to his ADHD doctor at Vanderbilt, suggests that)  Adults and teenagers think he is just the coolest, most interesting kid, but, the other kids don’t quite know what to make of him.

He told me this morning that some girl named Rachel said he was a "freak" to which I told him…"For one, Rachel is in the third grade.  What does she know about freaks?"  (to which he said, "no, she’s in 4th grade") Still, what do fourth grade girls know about freaks? Exactly…nothing.  I know some freaks.  #2 is not a freak.

Furthermore, I told him, he is ten times more interesting than Rachel will ever be.  Someday, Rachel will be bragging to her co-workers that she went to school with #2.  He will run into her somewhere and Rachel will be all over him and he will have the option to diss her and embarass her, which I hope he does. 

I’m not going to make him ride the bus anymore.  As long as I’m at home, not working, I can take him and pick him up.  Still,  I wish I could get on that bus and eat those mean, little shit kids who are mean to my baby (who has the sweetest attitude and would never hurt anybody’s feelings for anything), for lunch. They just don’t know yet that they are in the company of a little genius who could someday be like a Robin Williams, Jim Carey or Garth Brooks.  They don’t see it now, but, they will someday.

This is the part of parenting I hate. I know it’s character building for him.  Still, I’m not going to force him to endure relentless picking and teasing on the schoolbus everyday.  I wish all y’all could know how fantastic he is.  He really is great.