Today is the first day in about, oh gosh, a month maybe, that I have really felt like myself.
This last month has found me in an unusually stressed out mode of being that frankly, I just don’t like. I mean, we all have our moments and all that, but, me and stressed out/tense/wired/wound up mode just do not mix.
I was so stressed out that I considered smoking.
I was at the Mapco one day in the middle of the Wiggin’ period and I thought about it. Then I looked at what cigarettes cost….4.19 a packl! Who can afford to smoke. Remember the days when a carton of cigarettes cost less than $20? Good grief.
I almost smoked a cigarette one night me and Cherry were at Rosepepper. She was smoking and it’s a good thing all she had was menthols cause I don’t like menthols.
The real kicker that was proof from Above that I don’t need to smoke was when I drove my mother in her vehicle the other day. My mother is rarely without a Marlboro (Red) on her person. She especially likes to smoke in her car and she does often.
I took her up to Sears and I wasn’t in her car 5 minutes when my eyes got red and were burning like crazy. I mean, it was like somebody flipped a switch on. It was like that until we got back to my house and then the burning, red mess stopped.
I swear, I think I’ve become one of those irritating, ex-smokers who becomes “allergic” to cigarette smoke. I suppose that’s good, but, at the same time, it disturbs me. There is nothing more aggravating as an ex-smoker who is high and mighty about the habit.
There are times though, that I miss smoking. I wish I could smoke one a month or something. I know better than that though. I miss it in social situations. Now that you can’t smoke in most places, when people say “Let’s go outside and smoke”…dang, I miss it then. Except when it’s 20 degrees out.