Posts from the ‘Important Things in Sistary’ Category

Random Thursday Babbling


So I had a second interview today.  I want to tell something funny about it but I’m scared to.  I’ll tell it later.  Or email me or something and I’ll tell you.  HI-larious.

Lord help us all…I have discovered Carmen Electra’s Aerobic Striptease videos on OnDemand.   That is some good exercising. 

I took #2 to the Walgreen’s and bought what is probably the last Valentine cards for school that I’ll ever have to buy.  I got a little wistful but it lasted all of about 2 seconds.  I’ve been buying these things since 1997.  They don’t even have “parties” anymore. 

Speaking of #2, he is growing up on me.  I mean, he’s getting taller and just looking older.  He’s doing so well and has come such a long way.   016 He told me tonight he wants to wear “short-sleeved” pants to school tomorrow.  Cracked me up.

Not only did I turn 40 this week, but, so did Jennifer Aniston and tomorrow, my dear friend since high school days, Patrick, hits it.  Happy Birthday, MAN!  I was gonna send you a birthday card (why I asked for your address) but thus far, the card is sitting here on my desk. It’s the thought that counts.

The Facebook Obsession continues….somebody posted this photo today and it makes me laugh.


Check out those Cymbal Playahs there….that one in the middle in the hat is especially hot.  Heh.  Just looking at that picture makes my hair automatically go into “Hat Head” mode.  Ick.

Ovah and Ovah

I know you’re sitting there wondering “Reckon what the number one song in the nation was the day Miz Collie was born?”   Wonder no more….Crimson and Clover by Tommy James and the Shondells.


I know I post this picture every year on my birthday but I just love it.


This was the morning of February 10, 1969, in Cypress, CA.  That’s my Aunt Junie with the tall hair, my 2 year old sister and my Mom in the Hounds Tooth coat.  That would be me under said coat. Mom was in labor here.  To Pacific Hospital in Long Beach she went…

The thing about studying this picture on this birthday is my Aunt Junie is the same age I am now there.  She had just turned 40 a week or so before this.  A year or two later, Junie got breast cancer and died when I was 10.  She was my Dad’s younger sister.  Junie was one of those “forces”.  Not just a personality, but, an experience.  I have missed her throughout my life.  Everybody should have an Aunt like this.

Anyway…so I am 40.  40?  Do what?

I have NO problem being 40 at all.  I love it.  I love where I’m at (other than that Unemployment Thing), love where I’ve been (ok, maybe I haven’t LOVED ALL of it),  some wonderful people in my life, both near and far….I love that my sense of humor becomes more and more twisted with each passing year.  I love that I am finally ok with myself and that it’s ok to march to the beat of my own drummer and whether my beats keep time with everybody elses is really kinda moot to me.  I hate it took me so long to get to that point of comfort but I’m glad to be here.  

Ok…some laughs for you on my 40th birthday…my sister always says I never put embarassing pictures of me up here so I will.  Not all of them are embarassing….some are kinda cute.


I wish I still liked hats.  They make my head itch.


I am seriously considering going back to the Pebbles  Flintstone look and dressing identical to my sister.


I am proud of my membership in the No Cavity Club.  Too bad I let it expire. 


I still cry when they don’t let me ride the trains….


I really should don a cute,. red dress and go dancing more often…


Slumber parties are good…this one on my 9th birthday was the bomb.  That girl on the right with the long, blonde hair…Samantha Morgan…anybody know her?  Wonder whatever happened to her…and to Tammy Frost, Shannon Hurt…Whosit was a killer game.


I don’t miss hot rollers.


I’m still baffled as to why I thought I was fat on my wedding day.  That dress was a size 8! 


As much as I love my children, I am sooooo glad I am not in this condition at 40.  I’m glad I was done procreating by the time I was 30. 

Now, as for my To-Do List for my 41st year….easy…

1.  To get a good job.

2. To learn to play the accordion, dulcimer, or improve my Carter Scratch.  (Shut up. I LOVE accordions)


3.  Close your eyes if you don’t want to read this part….I’ll give you a second. (My kids…their father, etc)
To have really good sex.

A Plethora of Random Pontifications

The Countdown to 40 officially kicked off today and I can’t believe I had my camera and didn’t take a single picture.  My mind is going.

We are T minus 6 days and counting …..the festivities kicked off with lunch with my friends Tara, Kathy and Melissa. 

The Forty-Paloooza continues Saturday evening -there will be a harmonic convergance of the joint birthdays of me and my pal Scott.  (He’s gonna be but a young boy of 30 something and his day falls a couple days after mine) down on Broadway at the Big Bang so just bring yourself on down there.  I’ve never been there but I hear it’s fabulous.  7:00.

The Root Canaled tooth has healed well.  I had a couple of rather painful days post rootin’, but, it’s good now.

I was at the Guitar Lesson Place today and I was looking in a People magazine from December and how I missed this famous person obituary, I do not know…

My sleep patterns during this period of unemployment have been rather…irregular, and I often find myself SF36187watching Jeffersons reruns at 4 a.m. and Bentley just dang cracks me up.

I first remember Paul Benedict from Sesame Street though….

Glory Days


It’s pretty geeky if you take a picture of a tv screen, but, when its one of those screens that’s like a movie theater and you just happen to catch the opening of the Halftime show of the Super Bowl and it’s Bruce and Clarence and you get it looking like this, I don’t think it’s THAT geeky.  Maybe just a little.

I was like Ellie Mae about that dang home theater. 


A life-size Little Steven though….yikes!  Bruce needs to share some of his Stay Young secrets with his buddy there.

I’m not one who worships at the Church of Bruce but I most definitely appreciate his icon-ness and was diggin’ the moment quite a bit.

Funny thing about this gathering I was at…it was at the home of my friend Martha that I went to junior high and high school with. (Yet another Facebook reunion although I did see her at our 20th reunion in 07) I went to Brentwood High School my Freshman and Sophomore years.   It was kinda surreal when Bruce was singing “Glory Days” cause that song always reminds me of BHS .  Another girl I went to those schools with, Tracy, was there and I looked over and she was all up in the whole Bruce thing…


It was just kinda cool to be there and hearing Bruce do that song that was so popular back when I was at BHS and they played the radio in the cafeteria…and here some of us were all these years later..all growed up.  Not just grown up but 40 years old!  Just one of those moments that makes you go “hmmmm”.

Then, in the midst of my trot down Memory Lane, Jene’ who was one of best pals in 7th grade comes into the theater room, singing “Go To Yates” on the chorus….I had TOTALLY forgot about that…(Yates was the vocational school and of course, for students of Brentwood High School back in those days, the mere thought of going to Yates….HA)


Jene’ was killing me…then again, she always did.  Gosh, in 7th grade, just picture me and her…we were so silly. 

I had totally lost track of Jene’ after 10th grade until our Reunion.  A few weeks ago, she sent me the sweetest note on Facebook, talking about my Dad.  I had forgotten she was on our softball team the year he coached us.  There I pat myself on the back for my “amazing” memory, but, theres lots of things I forget about…like that.

Good times…good memories.


My Life In Pictures (Or Something Like That)

Scanning goodness for your viewing pleasure…


I would love to live life with the reckless abandon I had here…running around wearing my tights and a cool hat, not caring how ridiculous I look.  (There’s my Hot Aunt Lady in the background)


I was well on my way to becoming the most famous Chord Organist in the history of music.  I took it seriously.  Some of my biggest hits were “Down In The Valley”, and everybody’s favorite, “Barbara Allen.”


I hit the road briefly as part of a traveling acrobat show in ’79.


Jump ahead a few years, I tried to convince Merrill and Wayne Osmond to let me become “The Other” Osmond Sister since Marie had married and stuff.  They thought about it but said those eyebrows were a bit too much.


Me and Dwight had something really special.  He had a wee bit of an issue with my yellow britches and white, lace up shoes though and still….the eyebrows were an issue.


Who has the worst hairdo here?  Me or Hank Snow


I had a very strict rule that I was to wear the black and red Oprah Suit (she was wearing stuff like that a lot during this era) everytime I was around a famous country star named Hank.  Hank Thompson was HOT.  (Least my hair looked a LITTLE better here.  Ok, not much but a little!)

Becomes Final Today

This is not a celebratory post.  This is just fact of what today is. I’m not sad, but, I am also not jumping up and down happy neither.

I am grateful that I can sit here and tell you that Terry and I are dealing with each other very well. Our kids are coping well. They’ve had their moments and I’m sure there will be things about all this that will stay with them forever. I hate that.

In some ways, Terry and I communicate better than we did when married. If we can continue to have as cordial and positive of a relationship as we do today, it will be nothing but positive for our kids and for future grandkids. I mean, the best thing we ever acccomplished together was those three kids. No question.

I hate that with the Judge’s proclamation of us as officially Not Married, I not only have an ex husband, but, also Ex In Laws. They were my family for almost 20 years.

I want to say here, to them, that I still love them. That goes for the immediate In Laws to the Extended In Laws out in the Carolinas. I still think of my nephews and niece as my nephews and niece and will always think that way.

I became my nephews aunt when they were 5 and not yet 3. They are now almost 25 and 22. I was younger than both of them when I married their Uncle. I’ve had quite a number of laughs with those boys. I I hope they don’t forget the Florida Trip of 1999 especially and I hope it makes them laugh to remember it. I was at the hospital the day my niece was born and have thoroughly enjoyed watching her grow into one of the most charming little girls I’ve ever known. She’s only 3 so she won’t have any memory of me being her Aunt, I don’t guess. I still love that little girl though. I hope they will still think of me as their Aunt and know that I’m always here for them.

It’s a crappy situation. Divorce sucks.

Nobody could put a tear in a song like Tammy.

First Day

Y’all…I need some help.  Some decoratin’ help.  I am not a decoratuer.  At. All.  I need help decorating my office. 

Dig, if you will….my new Daytime Digs, won’t you?  It’s not huge, but, it’s an office, not a cube.

There’s a tall shelf, the same color as the desk, to the right of the desk there. 


Then, there’s this thing, that I’m not quite sure what it’s for.  Anybody? Bueller?  (Turn your head to the right) I have no clue what that’s for.

The first day was just dandy.  The drive out there is not that bad.  It would be a breeze if there weren’t no other cars on the road.  I could get there in about 25 minutes if it weren’t for everybody else trying to get to work at the same time. 

The Bossman (I’ll have to come up with a name for him as I get to know him better) is very pleasant, very confident and obviously knows his bidness. 

It dawned on me today, as I was driving back to the North side of the world, that one of the very worst job experiences I ever had was a preparation for this gig. 

It wasn’t the job itself I hated, but, the boss who hated the fact that I was alive, for some reason and made it her mission to make my life miserable for two years.  I was a Trade Sales Rep.  And dammit, I was GOOD at it.  Until now, that was the best paying job I had ever had.  The work was not hard, but, oh lardy, that woman that was my boss was just the bitch from hell.  (I don’t like to use that phrase to describe people, but she was). 

This was the era during my first divorce and she jumped all over me because divorce was against “God’s law” and all that jazz.  I am not lying.  She called me into her office to inform me of this.  My mouth dropped.  Because she felt that way about divorce?  NO.  Because she, herself….yep.  Divorced.  It’s a good thing I was strong in my faith at that point cause I’m here to tell you, those people would’ve been enough to make somebody turn atheist.   I didn’t turn atheist or nothing.  I ended up escaping leaving after two years to take a job at the same company that paid less and was ten times harder, but, I never regretted it at all. 

They used to make us sit through all these sales training things.  Good lordamighty…constantly, but, it did dawn on me today that all that misery was not in vain because I became familiar with the Sales culture that will once again be my day to day world.

My official title is “Consultant Coordinator.”  (Sounds faincy don’t it?)  Besides the regular Administrative Assistant sort of things, one of my biggest jobs is to help the boss create an “Office Culture.”  I  am to be a cheerleader/therapist/encourager to the sales people.  I get to plan shindigs and stuff too. (That’s where my training from the Gentleman Formerly Known As My Boss will come in handy)

So, because my office will be a place that needs to say “Come on in, sit right down”, I have to make it look like that.  I am clueless.

Oh…this isn’t decorating, but, you gotta see this.

This bottle of lotion is now at my fourth job with me.   You can see how much is left in it.   I’ve had that bottle of lotion for 3+ years.  I think I was still working for the GFKAMB when I got it)  I can’t believe it hasn’t run out cause I use it all the dang time.  It’s kinda like Willie Wonka’s Everlasting Gobstopper.”

Gonna See the King?

Besides the stock market about to collapse and all that mess, you know how else I know that Jesus might be about to come back to Earth to gather his jewels? 

I didn’t make my bed this morning.  For the first time since I moved, I did not make my bed.  I was running late and I knew I had to get gas and get the DQ to her Dad’s house to get to school. 

The thing that makes me think the trumpet of the Lord will soon sound and time will be no more, is not so much that I didn’t make my bed.  It’s that it’s only 8:26 in the morning and I have thought about the fact that I didn’t make my bed this morning a lot and it’s making me nuts.  So much so, I may go home at lunch and make it.

What has happened to me?  Is this my inner Felix Unger coming out?  Is this the real me that I haven’t ever met before?


September 9, 1993, 1:07 pm, Tara Rose discovered America.

I remember the Blue Magic Marker Incident like it was yesterday. How did she go from this….

To 15 years old overnight? (This is her and her friend Holly)

Happy Birthday Tara…like it or not, your Mama loves you.

Buried Treaure

When I was at my Mom’s house today, I found some stuff I didn’t know was still around and it tickled me to death.

I found the very first two cd’s I ever owned. 

One was Neil Young and the Shocking Pinks-Everybody’s Rockin’, which I purchased at the recommendation of one Steve Goodhue.  I worked with Steve at the Hall of Fame.  He was one of the first, real free spirits I knew.  (I was 18 then remember?)  He was in his late 20’s or early 30’s at the time and was so creative and funny. 


The last time I saw Steve was at my wedding reception in 1989.  Has anybody seen Steve?  Tell him I said hey.  He was just the coolest feller. 

He would make these album/tapes of his own songs.  He’d make his own album covers, like one in particular I remember he called “Hubcap Annie.”  He took this picture of himself in front of the old Hubcap Annie building on Wedgewood. 

I remember going with Steve and his girlfriend, Annie, to see a show at the Belcourt Theater that had Rodney Crowell, Vince Gill, Rosanne Cash, John D. Loudermilk, John Hiatt, Pat McLaughlin…1987.  The last year I really had lots of fun.  That was the year I saw TONS of amazing, live music.  Sometimes I wish I could turn the clock back to that year.

Then the other one….oh boy this is a good ern….

otis.jpg  I think my friend from high school, Billy Robinson, gave this to me.  Either him or Dave Rice.  I think it was Billy.  He gave it to me for Christmas. I think the year was 1986.  Whoa. 

Something else these cds remind me of is how when I got my first cd player, which seems to me, was quite expensive at the time, it messed up the first week.  I remember asking Alan Stoker, who is the Recording Engineer Extraordinaire at the HOF what he thought it could be and he said “Sounds like your laser is messed up.”  My laser.  How high tech was that for the time, I ask you?

These cd’s still sound as good as they did over 20 years ago and have given me a large happy today, which was a weird day. 

And Holding

I’m not disturbed that I’m 39 today. I do find it hard to believe that I’ll be 40 this time next year, but, I don’t have any problems with it. I am finding I like things as I get older. I certainly like myself a whole lot better now than I did, say, on my 19th birthday.

I tend to post this photo on my birthday cause I like it.

junie__sandra___barbara.jpg This is my Mom on the way to Pacific Hospital in Long Beach, CA  on February 10, 1969. That’s my Aunt Junie and my sister.

I kinda like this picture of myself too.


Now, if we saw a pregnant woman with Marlboros on her belly today, we’d call the Pregnant Police on her and she would be called a terrible mother.

This is another favorite picture made the day I was born, actually pretty quick after I was born.

Because this was soooo long ago, they didn’t let Dad’s in the delivery room.  My Aunt Junie took this of Dad calling my Grandma and Pop Collie in San Antonio to let them know that I had arrived.  I can almost hear his half laugh/half cry.  Hee.

Something else that kinda makes me go “whoa” about being 39 is that I’m almost the same age as my Dad was there.  He was 42.  Mom was a babe of 34.


A Smiff Celebration

 We celebrated birthdays with the family tonight.  My sister in law, Marilyn, and I have the same birthday, y’see. The big day isn’t til tomorrow though.

I got a groovy present from my mother and my mother in law. You can see it right here. 


30 Years?

August 16, 1977elvis_frt_page1.jpg

We were visiting my mother’s sister and her family in Alexandria, Louisiana.  Visits to Alec were always full of laughter (mostly my mother and Aunt Pat and their distinct, cackling laughter that rang from one end of Eola Dr. to the the_duncan_s.jpgother), kids putting on awesomely wonderful “variety” shows (complete with costumes and Chord Organ solos), trips to Valentine Lake, begging my Uncle Huey to play his old, out of tune, upright, honky tonk pat__nootsie___bobbie.jpgpiano for us (Don’t Get Around Much Anymore to me is “Huey’s Theme.”) jumping on their trampoline or practicing cartwheels on Cousin Kim’s ultra cool balance beam in the backyard, trips to the Dairy Queen, and 8 year old Sista being subjected to many taunts being the youngest kid, especially regarding their cross-the-street-neighbor, David.

Those cousins and sister of mine knew how to get little Sista’s dander up by saying David was my boyfriend.  Nothing would piss me off more.  I would come in the house if David was in the yard and go back out when he left.  I remember one time them saying “Sharon, he’s gone home…you can come out now”, only to find the ultra creepy David hiding under my Uncle Huey’s rocking chair and me screaming and crying and going back in the house.  They were so mean to Little Sista.  Gosh, but those are some of my most treasured memories (not Creepy David).  Alec is not exactly what you call a “Happenin'” town, but, it goes to show, it doesn’t matter where you are, but, who is there that matters.  Wonderful memories.

It was Creepy David we were looking at out the front window of Pat & Huey’s that hot, August day.  I don’t remember exactly what he was doing, but, it was something that warranted the Collie and Duncan Kids to watch and laugh at him.

All of a sudden, my mother, who was putting her makeup on in the bathroom (oh lordy, the production my mother’s beauty routine was then and is to this day), she hollered “OH NO!!!”  I can remember as clear as it were yesterday, all of us at once saying “What?”   Even more so, the sound of her voice saying “Elvis died!!!” and the gasps that went up from all us kids. There’s no way this could be.  I remember the rest of that day, all of us piled in Kim and Kelly’s room, really, in shock.  Kim had a picture of Elvis on her wall.  No way the beautiful Elvis was gone.

At 8, I didn’t really totally grasp how signifigant a day it was but I can remember the sadness we all felt.  Talking back and forth.  I wish I had a video of all us kids talking.  I’d love to hear what we said. 

One of the things I remember feeling so heavy about was the fact that Elvis had a daughter right about my age and how devastating it must’ve been for her.  I think that weighed on me the most then.  I can remember looking through my Aunt Pat’s vast collection of Elvis albums that day. The one that got me the most was the album cover for “How Great Thou Art” and on the back is a picture of Elvis in what looks to be like one of the suits he wore in “Speedway” and noticing what gigantic pores he had.  Hmm.  Funny the things you remember. I can also remember listening to the “Live From Elvis Presley Blvd” album on their old stereo, which had come out not long before, and Elvis singing “Blue Eyes Crying In The Rain” made me want to cry, but, I didn’t want anybody to think I was weird for crying.

It was the first event I can remember in my lifetime where everybody can remember where they were, what they were doing when they heard the news.  It was huge. It had an impact of some sort on just about everybody in my world and on me personally.

I’ve written before about my numerous trips and memories of going to Graceland through the years.  I haven’t been since me and Mr. Smiff’s honeymoon.  I would love to take my kids there.  They would dig it.

I’ve mentioned how my dad had a small part in the beginning of Elvis’ career.  In March, 1955, Dad booked Elvis at his club in Houston.  I think maybe 100 people showed up.  Someone had the bright idea to record the show and it is now said to be the very first live recording of Elvis, Scotty, Bill and DJ.  Up until that time, Elvis had not been seen much west of the Mississippi.  You can go here and hear part of an interview done with my Dad about this show.  I’m not sure when it was done, but, judging by the sound of his voice, I’d say it was the mid to late 80’s.  Two things crack me up about this…one, he’s listed as “Bill” Collie and two, Dad telling of how before that show, he had gotten some mail (this was in the days listeners mailed requests to their dj’s) but it was nothing that spectacular.  It was a small role in his career, but, most definitely an important step in Elvis’ journey.  I’m pretty proud of that and my 15 year old son (who has a love and appreciation for the roots of rock and roll) is extremely proud.

It’s hard to imagine how a poor kid from Tupelo, Mississippi, could come along and change the world with the curl of his lip, the swivel of his hips, but, mostly, with his voice.  It’s really unreal.  I wish he could’ve hung around a little longer, but, glad he stayed as long as he did.

God bless Elvis.

Breathing Easier

I just realized that today is one year since I have smoked.  I was sorta forced into quitting cause I got sick as a dog.  That made the withdrawal easier, for sure. 

Whatever it took, I’m glad I stopped and hope I don’t ever do it again.