Posts from the ‘Things That Make You Go “Ewwww”’ Category

Pulp Non-Fiction

I’m taking the scenic route through the Root Canal tomorrow morning.  I’ve had one before.  I’ll be glad to have it done cause it makes me nervous having a bum tooth.  I don’t remember the whole Pulp Removal being painful, contrary to what people make it to be.  Then again, a Mammogram is not painful to me and I did have a nearly 10 lb baby without any drugs so…

 It’s not too painful yet.  It has moments that it’s tender and uncomfortable. 

Is it EVER going to stop raining?

All I Wanna Do…

The Crown episode of Friday? I was sorta a’feared that perhaps the poppage of the Crown had something to do with the warning the Dentist gave me about a year ago. He said then that #14 tooth needed to be “watched.” I asked him if it needed crowning or something and he said “Oh….it’s already been crowned” as he laughed an evil laugh. He then warned me that I had better make friends with Dental Floss, as my flossing habits weren’t exactly up to par.

So I made friends with Floss and I’ve become rather OCD about flossing. Obviously, my flossing skillz haven’t been enough to save good ol #14. Looks like another cruise through the Root Canal is in my future, but, obviously, that won’t be happening until Yours Truly is gainfully employed again with Dental coverage.

I knew as soon as I heard Gina, the dental hygienist who has been hygiening my teeth for many years now, gasp and saw her make faces that it wasn’t good. She asked if it was hurting me, which praise Jehovah, it isn’t. “Well, you’re lucky cause it’s bad.”

I’ve had a canal dug through the root before. I don’t remember it being a particularly painful experience. What stood out to me was before the procedure, I had gone to get this tooth crowned and the Dentist started drilling and I could feel it. He kept shooting me with novacaine and I kept fillin’ it. I literally left his dentist chair and went down the street to an Endodontist who did the honors. Ever since then, going to the dentist makes me nervous as a cat about the whole digging in my teeth thing but even more so about how much it’s going to cost. Even with dental insurance, I ended up having to finance the rest of the thing. Pissed me off.

So, I’ve got a Bum Tooth that I can’t do nothing about at the moment and as long as it nots hurting me or causing some sorta freaky infection in my person, it’s ok….I’m still looking for a job and this whole job looking thing is to the point that it’s just aggravating. I did have a good interview with an agency last week that I felt really good about.

I have decided that tomorrow I’m not going to think about this job thing. I have been obsessed with it now since December 5. Would anybody be offended if I didn’t think about it for 24 hours and just had, like, a fun day? Anybody here have an issue with that? Can I go tomorrow and just play? Like take a field trip or something?

I knew you wouldn’t mind. 

 So, this is the rule.  If I run into you tomorrow, do not ask me how the Job Search is going.  I’m going to have a Fun Day tomorrow cause I deserve it.  I’ll report back later on what I did with pictures.

Yuck Sweet Yuck

Me and #2 have had a lovely lil’ evening. We went to the Cracker Barrel before going to see Bedtime Stories (LOVE IT).

Ran into old friends the Peasalls and their rather large brood of offspring, which now includes a son in law!  (Thing #232 this week that has made me feel elderly.  Sheesh. I was at Mike & Sally’s wedding!)

Upon checking out, I remembered I needed to get me one of those car air freshener thingies that Yankee Candle makes.  I washed the ‘Stang today (dang, that’s a purty car) and wanted some smelly-good stuff for it.

Usually, I get the Clean Cotton air freshener or the one that smells like Leather cause neither one is very overpowering.  I like smelly good stuff but I don’t like it to knock me prostrate when I catch a whiff of it, ya know?

What in the name of fresh air made me decide to get the “Home Sweet Home” scent?  I’ve had that candle before and it smells ok, however, the car air freshener?  Not so much.

The ‘Stang is all shiny and purty and looking oh-so-good, but the inside smells like cough syrup. 

When we left the movie, I still had my “medium” drink (which was about the size of a jug of milk) and every sip tasted like Creomulsion for Children because of that dang air freshener.  Makes me gag just thinking about it. 

It don’t smell like any home I’ve ever lived in, unless you count when we’d get sick when we were little.  Mom gave us the different colored Triaminic.  If memory serves, the orange Triaminic was not so bad, but the YELLOW?  I can taste that stuff now.  Ew. If I were to smell that stuff now, I’d go running for my life.

The smell of Vicks Vapo Rub, to this day, makes me want to gag and be scared all at the same time.  Because of that, I never used that stuff on my kids when they’d get sick. 

I remember being reeeeallly little, being sick and that old vaporizer we had that was LOUD running, and that Vicks crap all over me.   And that Creomulsion cough syrup bottle that had those two, happy looking kids on the bottle??  Obviously, they weren’t sickly and hadn’t had that crap forced down their mouths or they wouldn’t have been so happy looking!

The One Where The Manchild Dives For The Ball…And Missed

You know how you wake up in the morning to have your regular ol’ day…you are pretty happy that the humidity is low so YES! It’s a Good-Hair-Day-Tuesday.  You’re feeling right good about yourself and your future, life is good, heigh-ho, heigh-ho, it’s off-to-work-you-go?  It’s a productive morning, get lots done and you’re thinking “So, what will I do at lunchtime?” …..

Then you get a phone call telling you your kid has split his head open in PE class. You call the school and are told that 911 has been called, your kid is bleeding oh and be sure you get a plastic surgeon to do his sutures?  So much for a leisurely lunch time, eh?I’ve never had one of those kinds of phone calls before until today.

  Now, I’ve had kids get stitched up, (one with an unfortunate encounter with a merry go round, the other an encounter with bare feet and a rake) broken bones, (big toe and wrist) the Vapors, an ambulance ride, handed my not-yet-one year old-baby to a stranger to put him to sleep to put tubes in his ears, had the same baby about a year later, severely dehydrated, suffering from Rotavirus, in the hospital hooked up to IV’s for three days, rocked and held a feverish little one (and not so little) more times than I could possibly remember, sat in the bathroom in the middle of the night with the shower running, letting the steam clear a croupy cough, my 2 year old drink bleach, saw one of my kids nearly drown at 3 years old, an ER trip thinking one had appendicitis, been thrown up on, pooped on , peed on, all those things more times than I could begin to remember.  January 2 I will have been a parent 17 years.  I’ve done a lotta stuff, like every other parent has.

Something about hearing the numbers “911” in relation to your child, who is about 25 minutes away makes your heart just stop for a second.  Mine sure did today.  I waited at Hendersonville Hospital for a good 25 minutes before the ambulance arrived with the Manchild in tow.  I wasn’t even sure if they were bringing him there because the ER people hadn’t gotten a call, the office lady at Station Camp didn’t know if they took him there or to Sumner Regional.

Finally, the ambulance pulls up and I go over to the back, nervous, not totally knowing what I’m gonna see, kinda on the verge of tears, in total Talk-To-Jesus-Out-Loud mode…and they pull the Manchild out on the stretcher. 

Now, you gotta realize, I haven’t seen the Manchild wear anything except a black tshirt with some sort of band name on the front for probably two years and baggy blue jeans.  He had on his Gym shirt, which is gray and has his school name on the front and he had on shorts!  I forgot the boy had legs.  We also don’t live in the same house anymore.

So, he’s got on a totally different color than I’m accustomed to seeing, his head is wrapped in gauze, oxygen thingies up his nose, blood on him and I say something very motherly (and very sincere) like “Oh Tyler” and my firstborn child waves at me and says “Mom….I look like a retard.”

The Wellness Class (what happened to “Gym” or “PE?”) was playing “Flash Football.”  I don’t even know what that is.  A friend of mine asked me if that was when you run down the field and show your ass. I don’t know. I’m assuming it’s something akin to Flag Football.  They were inside the gym and Tyler went to dive for a catch and…well…he missed. 

He doesn’t remember the missed catch so that means he went to his Special, Happy Place for a moment.  He was pretty pale when he got to the hospital and he was chattering.  Tyler is a big talker but he’s usually very calm.  He was almost hyper.  I guess part of that was nerves, part of it mighta been a little shock…he was cracking me up though.

They ran him through the CAT scanner and that all came out fine.   A plastic surgeon looked at his boo boo and said that he narrowly missed hitting a major artery in his forehead as well as narrowly missed the muscle that controls the eyebrow movement.   4 cms with tissue and skull exposed.  Yee haw. The Manchild is fortunate all around and that is not lost on his Dad or myself. (There are more pictures on the Flickr over there but some are a little…ick so I wanted to be sensitive to my more sensitive readers)

 I got paper towels and washed his hands and face (first time he’s let me do anything for him like that since I can remember) and even though it was a crappy thing to have happen, I enjoyed getting to play Mommy to my big boy, even for just a minute.  (Enjoy is probably not the right word)   I couldn’t believe he wasn’t fighting me.  This boy likes to be independent.  I respect that and totally encourage him to take care of himself but it’s interesting how when your kid is sick or hurting. that mother instinct just kicks in.

The changes that have occurred in our family the last few weeks, the logistical changes, etc.  I don’t know…I’m glad he let me be Mom and do my job, even though when he first got in the room he said “Mom…I’m 16. I’m ok.”  After the EMT guy said something about how much he bled and that “that’s your Mom, man” it was ok for me to slip into that mode cause none of his buddies were around or nothing. 

All the stuff that’s gone on lately has been difficult for all of us.  It’s so important to me that Tyler knows that just because I’m at a different address (he chose to stay with his Dad) that I’m still his Mom and my love for him is no different.  I may not be a perfect mother, but, those kids are my heart.  Even big, tall and hairy like the Manchild is, he’s still my baby boy.

When we left the hospital, I hugged the Manchild and told him I loved him and was glad he was ok.  I decided when I moved that I have to start telling those kids every single day I love them.  They aren’t really warm/fuzzy/”I love you” saying kinda kids and I’m not so good at saying it but thats another thing about my life I’m trying to change.  Days like today are such a reminder that you don’t know from day to day, how your life can change in the drop of a football.

Blog Stats and Stuff That Doesn’t Mean A Hill ‘O Beans

How do people get here to  this here website?  It’s doing searches such as thus:

Jew Naked Kid,(I don’t even wanna think about what thats about) lifeguard, Culhanes of Hee Haw, LOTS of Viva Viagra, people interested in Joni Mitchell cause theys lots of searches for “They paved paradise and put up a parking lot”, McDreamy…the searches for “Sister Smiff” make me laugh.  I am “sister” to one…to the rest of you’uns, I am your Sist-UH.  Got it? (Except to my Shishter, of course)

TONS of hits thanks to the phrase “widows peak” and/or Eddie Munster, in fact, my second highest viewed post, according to my WordPress stats,  is the one about my widows peak.  (Is that really THAT interesting that that particular post gets that many views?  Those aren’t that uncommon, are they?? Am I freak?)

People looking for Johnny Cash, Richard Widmark, Jackie Joseph, pregnant men and famous people turning 50 have all dropped by, even if only for a second.

I must say, though, I am quite disturbed about the search for “Crazy Old Grand Mama Sekx.”  Don’t be coming ’round here looking for that sorta thing, now.

I never look in the spam file but I did and good lord….we don’t thank the Good Lord near enough for Akismet. 

Because It IS About Me

I don’t know ’bout ‘chall, but, I’m having quite the time with this hour ahead thing.  I think it’s cause they moved it up to the beginning of March.

I’m pretty good in the mornings.  I think of myself as a freak of nature that likes to stay up late AND get up early (sometimes).  This hour early thang, though….I am not crazy about.

This Daylight Savings Time thing is going to benefit me how?
*** I thought of a way it benefits me!  I won’t have to worry about changing this one clock in the kitchen cause….it’s correct now! Woo hoo. 

True Story

Former co-worker Dave (who I didn’t realize how much I missed until today when I talked to him on the phone) has a new job.

FCWD noticed some brown droplets on his desk.  He thought perhaps he had spilled Coke.  It wasn’t Coke.

Apparently, the bathrooms on the floor above him had a little leakage problem. 

Ew. That’s a fine “Welcome Aboard.”